Leader of Anarchy Rebel Group: "It's not a phase"

Sammiches822

Tasha Murillo, Senior SGN Journalist

Leader of A.R.G., Rebel Anarchafire (Clyde Nelson)

ORANJESTAD- The city of Oranjestad is in a panic after local teenager "Rebel Anarchafire", or Clyde Nelson, told his mom: "It's not a phase, Mom. This is who I am." 

It all started when Nelson's mother, Nancy, began noticing very rebellious behavior from her 17-year old son after taking him out to see acclaimed movie Willyfighters. Nancy Nelson told SGN that Clyde was prone to acting out things he saw on television and movies, such as inviting burglars into the family home after watching Home Alone, and that he admired the way the Shire was plunged into an anarchist state after Babbletrus's invasion. Soon after seeing the movie, Clyde began spending loads of time away from home, only returning to his upper-middle class white family to sleep and to retrieve his inhaler. Soon, Nancy even began receiving notices from his school, saying that he was absent during 7th Period Study Hall. After having a stern talk with her son, Nancy discovered that Clyde had formed a gang of other caucasian upper-middle class **"ANARCHISTS"**. Activities of these anarchists included skipping study hall (exclusively), placing their feet on desks and reclining until told not to do so by a teacher, and ding-dong-ditching several houses in the Alfa Beach neighborhood.

"I even noticed major changes in his wardrobe," Nancy added. "He was donating all his nice schoolclothes from the Gap and Banana Republic to charity, and would buy these awful spiky leather clothes online, only after he had my permission to use my credit card. He's almost unrecognizable. When I tell him to change in the morning, he begins to sob violently and tells me that I'm ignorant and I don't understand him. I'm afraid I don't!" 

Clyde was even jailed overnight for jaywalking, sources say. Once placed behind bars, the Alfa Beach Police Department told us that he started to weep, telling the police numerous times that he was white and his family had money. After ten minutes of unbroken sobbing, he asked for his inhaler, which his mother provided upon her arrival.

This generation's trend in following what they see on screens calls into question how appropriate today's movies and shows really are. Politicians in Acadie are petitioning for G-Rated movies exclusively, while Follywood Studios in Fulfwotz has stated that they would rather eat a thousand newborn children than release only G-Rated movies. What do you think?

~SGN Online, helping you act like you care~

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Rita Clemens, Modaora- i was in an anarchist group back in '68. we had a lot of fun drenching politicians in cow blood and bombing government buildings but this is a whole new level and its clearly becoming a serios problem

Tammy Toffee, Fulfwotz- i like spiky leather clothes too but i dont wear it outside of the bedroom

Kirk Benson, New Enderton- do any of you remember when SGN actually had daily weather reports?

Crystallina Wintar XDD, Athitica- LOL! gud 4 him. adult govt bigwigs thik they can rule us all lol thats not how goverment works. i am a teen, jelly bro? XD

0031benjy

You depict society extremely accurately whether or not intentional and you can still make me laugh, kudos to you!

Vetous

As an artist who respects creative integrity and intellectual property, I am disgusted at how much Acadie is threatening me, famed Follywood director Vetous, from creating art. My next movie "Furious Hour 9: Era of Ultron" will be a masterpiece, and I would personally eat a thousand new born children if it meant keeping my artistic rights. Good day to you sir!!!!!!!!!@!

pc1894

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